I used to be allergic
to anyone with hair
All my girlfriends had to shave,
otherwise I wouldn't care
Now I am pleased to report
I really only changed a bit
Now I'm allergic to clothes,
all they're gonna do is strip
I've read a lot of Shakespeare,
I've seen his movies too
Not bad for an amateur,
it's my professional deal
And as you can gather from that,
I didn't do too well at school
The only thing I ever learned
was how to be allergic to rules
I feel I ought to tell you
that my doctor isn't well
When he saw me for a check -up
he began to check himself
Felt a niche in several places
and as he began to scratch
came an interrupt
Now, out in Scandinavia,
girls really do have fun
Even those without blonde hair
are not to be outdone
While on a visit last year,
I must have dated two or three
But every time I got on home
I found that he gave a tragic to me
I feel I ought to tell you
that my doctor isn't well
When I went in for a jiggle,
he began checking himself
Found a niche in several places
Undersea began to scratch
I just had to dash
Now, you might pose the question
Like, what excuse is that?
How can you be allergic to
An allergy you've had?
Well, let me tell you this truth
When I was a ripe old age of ten
My parents, they were so surprised
Should have seen the
look that's in their eyes
When I became allergic to them
And the moral of this tale
If you end up in a jail
All you need to unwind
is a little time you