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Elf
Dilly has a three -legged
chicken named
Maxine.
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Now,
Elf ain't particularly proud of
Maxine.
To tell you the truth,
he's just a little bit ashamed.
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You can't exactly blame him, though,
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because I doubt you'll find a grown man anywhere
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that enjoys walking down the street with a
three -legged chicken clucking after him.
Most of us thought that
Elf
Dilley would be a millionaire
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before he was 40,
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but he's had a streak of bad
luck that'd sink a boat.
First of all,
Elf had this cow that wandered in his house
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one afternoon while he was gone
and ate up 35 pounds of mothballs
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and fell over in a dead faint.
Well, she knocked over a kerosene lamp and she
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set the house on fire and burned it to the ground
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and then it rained and washed
all the ashes away so
Elf got home and he
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thought somebody stole his house.
Well
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Elf went running over to tell the sheriff
and he cut through
Winnie
Duncan's backyard.
Now
Winnie is back there sawing
on this big oak tree and it fell and hit
Elf right on the head and broke both his
feet.
Well
Winnie felt so bad about it that he gave
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Elf an old set in and two
dozen eggs.
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And the next week
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Elf's hogs broke into his
still and after a couple
hours of drinking, well,
they got pretty mean and tore down his fence and run the
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old setting hen off.
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And the eggs got cold and only
one of them hatched and
that was
Maxine and she had three legs.
Of course now we're all kind of doubtful
that
Elf
Dilly will be a millionaire
by the he's 40.
We're all just kind of hoping
that he'll break even this year.
My old barn's about to cave in
It'll fall right on the house I'm in
My barrel insurance is overdue again
Still I might break even this year
Well, I got me a job, and I had it made I worked three weeks,
but I didn't get paid
Somebody stole my only chicken that laid
Still, might break even this
year
Well, a tax man say he don't
mean me no harm
But if I don't pay,
they're gonna take my
farm
If they do that, just as sure as you're born
I might break even this year
A
Republican votes fifty cents in a wink
A
Democrat votes a dollar an d a drink
If I vote for them both I'll do better I think
And I might break even this
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year
You
Lee Hazlewood 
